Heartsong
by Mutilated Pancake
Summary: Full Summary Inside! Rated T For Safety! Enjoy My Loves! GONE FISHIN' BE BACK SOON (Temp Hiatus)!
1. Cold Nights

**AN:** **Here they come! Here come the Winchesters! They're demon hunters on wheels! They're hunters and they're chasing after someone! They're gaining on you, so you better look alive! Dean's revving up the powerful IMPALA! When the odds are against them and there's dangerous work to do, you bet your life the Winchesters will see it through! Go Winchesters! Go Winchesters! GO! Sorry, not sorry. I've been watching Speed Racer for the last like five days. Moving on. BTWSS has been removed per my friends' request. I don't know the reason but I honored her request. Sorry y'all. Moving forwards. Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed Sleepy Little Sickos! That fic was a lot of fun to write :) I wanted this out sooner but pulled muscles, delayed packages, dog sitting, phone slowly dying a painful death, endless job hunting, helping other authors with their work (y'all are doing great, keep it up!), and book projects! Yeah. Busy girl in the course of a few days. Whew. Anyways, here's the overdue s5 fix-it that's been stewing in my head for years.**

 **Summary: s5 fix-it! Long overdue ;) Sam finds a home in the Men of Letters Bunker, finding ways to stop the devil. With the devil stopped and not wanting to return home, Sam finds a way to keep himself busy.**

 **Profile up and running!**

 **Mistakes? Most likely. Flames? *pulls out The First Blade***

 **Enjoy my loves!**

 **Cold Nights Are Long**

The wind howled through the mountains blowing snow to blanket the earth beneath. Further down towards the river that rushes past without a care, the snow is stained red.

The body of a creature that laid waste to land and village nearby was half in and half of the rushing water. The currents were angry that vile blood tainted it's pure and crisp body. The angry currents swept the dead beast away and allowed the snow and icy water from the mother falls above to cleanse it. The rapids calmed down and flowed with worry. The one who rid the forest of the foul beast was dying.

The one who rid the forest of the foul beast laid beneath an elderly tree, bleeding from his wounds. His energy is slowing waning. The snow beneath stained a deep angry red.

The boy stared ahead at white covered wonderland before him and let a tear fall from his pale cheek.

The forest sent him a guardian. A guardian to look after him, to love him, to listen, and to never be alone again.

The guardian walked up to the boy and licked the tear away. The guardian howled loud and deep, then silenced itself. It laid down on the boy despite the blood to keep his charge warm.

The boy flinched when he felt something lick his cheek and then laid on top of him to keep him warm after singing his song. The boy wrapped a weak arm around his protector and let his heavy eyes close.

The darkness carried him away to peaceful oblivion.

 **Daaaaaaamn that was vague. This was once a poem I wrote. It's different than this but most of it's the same.**

 **Until Next Time! *hums Speed Racer theme***


	2. Life Sucks So Play!

**AN: Whenever I start a new book project (right now I'm outlining and drafting two novellas) I lose motivation to post chapters here. My focus just shifts from here to my project until they're complete. Pffft. The life of a writer *shrugs* Moving forward. I watched San Diego Comic Con live on YouTube! I really wish I could've gone but it's soooooooo expensive! I would have to sell a kidney and part of my soul. That and I wouldn't want to go for just a weekend, I would want to stay in California for the week and explore, but again. Too expensive. The airfare and hotel alone would be enough to break my bank. If you did get to go this year, how was it? Did you have fun? Did you meet all the people you wanted to? Did you take a million and one pictures? Meet new people? One day I'll be able to attend but for now, hooray for YouTube! It's how I watch all the panels of the other cons. If you're one of the people that go to these cons and uploads them to YouTube, you're awesome! And you save me money XD Alright. Let's see what the Winchesters are up to now, shall we? I think I've rambled on long enough anyway.**

 **Wanna say hi on my social media? Visit my profile!**

 **Mistakes? Most likely. Flames?! *chants exorcism***

 **Enjoy my loves!**

 **Life Sucks. So Play!**

With Lucifer dead and gone, Sam recovered alone in a hospital in the heart of Alaska. He was upset that Dean wasn't there but he would rather recover alone than let Dean see him in the condition he had been in, not that Dean would want to see him anyway. As much as he hated it, sometimes he wished he had died that day or while he was on the operating table. Fate obviously had other plans or Death just didn't want to deal with him. His new companion helps a lot. Sam can't help but smile anytime he returned home to his companion. His boy was always waiting by the main door, garage door, or in the library for him.

He pulled into the drive and opened the garage doors then headed in to park his Suzuki GSX-R 1000. He never thought he'd own a motorcycle but here he was. He parked his bike and took off his helmet. When he first got the helmet, his hair would stick up at odds and ends. He let it grow out and now pulls his hair back before he takes off. He so used to a ponytail he would just pull it back and forget about it. Sam got off his bike and went to the door that leads into the bunker.

While recovering in the hospital Sam was approached by a man. He told him about the Men of Letters and handed him a key to the safest place on the planet. The day he arrived at the bunker, he became a Man of Letters. He cleaned the bunker top to bottom and made the bunker a home. He found financial records and saw he was set for life but has a small job at a local bar in town.

He opened the door and smiled. His companion was right there waiting for him. His guardian.

"Hey, Gohan. How's my big guy?" Sam cooed as scratched the wolf on his head.

Sam wasn't sure how but he was given a Guardian. Guardians are like spirit guides, unlike spirit guides who are there with you since birth some guardians don't come around until later in life. Like Sam. His guardian the wolf, didn't come until later in his life. He theorized the reason was that growing up or at least until he was nine he had Zanna.

The guardian happily gave his boy kisses and followed him to his room. Knowing Sam was about to shower and change the wolf laid on his bed while Sam showered in the ensuite shower. When Sam came out of the shower dressed in pajamas, Gohan panted happily and hopped off the bed. Sam in pajamas meant he didn't have to work tonight. Which was good. Gohan knew the hunt Sam had returned from was hard. He wished his boy would've taken him along but Sam was really worried about this one and left him at home. Gohan huffed at that. He was a Guardian. His job was to guard his boy.

"How about some dinner? I'm starving." Sam said with a smile.

Gohan hopped off the bed and headed right to the kitchen with a laughing Sam behind him. Sam took out some raw steaks and piled two of them on a plate with a chicken leg. Guardians didn't have to eat but it seemed like Gohan liked the finer things in life. Sam placed the plate in front of the wolf and turned to the stove to make his own dinner. After being on his own for a year he taught himself to cook.

When his meal was finished he ate the table and let his thoughts drift. He really missed Dean. He really did and he wanted to see him again, but the problem was that his old was destroyed and his other phones were no longer in use. He knew he would be at Bobby's but Sam wasn't sure if he would be welcomed. After all, Bobby told him to lose his number. Maybe this was for the best.

He snapped out his thought when he felt a nose nudging his arm.

"Sorry, Gohan. Guess I got lost in my own head again." Sam said.

Gohan whined. Sam rubbed his furry back and finished his dinner. After dinner, he washed his dirty dishes and lead Gohan back to his where the wolf and man vegged out in front of the flat screen. Sam turned it on and flipped through the channels. He finally landed on Doctor Who. Jess had loved it and got him into it. Sam sighed and got lost in his thoughts again.

Gohan watched his boy drift off into his mind again and lightly growled. He hated that. He hopped off the bed and started jumping on it off and on, then started nudging Sam.

"Gohan what are you doing? What's going on?" Sam asked.

Gohan continued to act like a hyperactive puppy until Sam got it.

"So you want to play huh? Let's play." Sam said.

Sam got off the bed and ran into the hallway with Gohan. Hide and seek was a favorite. Sam ran down the hallway and turned a corner then hid until Gohan found him. The game lasted until Sam was tired out. Like eating, guardians didn't need sleep.

Gohan leads a tired Sam back to his room. Sam turned off his TV and got under the covers. Gohan snuggled next to him and Sam drifted off.

Gohan sighed. He knew the boy missed his brother, but it wasn't time for them to meet again. The time was coming sure, but it's not here yet. Until the time comes, Gohan has a job to do.

 **Yup. The wolf's name is Gohan. My friend asked if I would name him that after his German Shepherd Gohan XD**

 **Until Next Time! *dies***

 **Alright y'all, I need sleep so I'm going to bed. Reviews will answered next time!**


	3. Sing Like No One's Listening

**AN: ADULTING IS SUCH A JOY! *dies* Anyway. So my loves, you're going to hate me for this but after this fic is over I will be taking another hiatus to reconnect with SPN. I feel that the month I took did nothing. I still feel out of place and like I'm not doing my best and I feel so disappointed in myself and awful. So my hiatus will go from the end of the fic to December when my 12 Days of Sam (working title) comes out and then from there...I don't know. We'll have to cross the bridge once we come to it. I feel so bad. I just returned from a hiatus and pfffft. Hell, I don't feel happy with this fic and I just want to toss it in the trash, but I don't know what to do. Like I don't want to give up on this fic but at the same time, I can't move forward. I'm not burned out or have writers' block. Just feel out of tune, you know? I don't know. *sighs in frustration* Sorry for the rant. I don't have the best ability for expressing myself here. Verbally it's a lot worse. The word vomit is real. Alright, let's get going. When we left off, Gohan is taking good care of our boy!**

 **Profile working ;)**

 **Mistakes? Most likely. Flames?! *kicks it and reviewer into Lucifer's Cage***

 **Enjoy my loves!**

 **Sing Like No One's Listening**

Sam didn't have to work again tonight. In fact, he didn't have to work until the bar he sang at called him. It was usually a Friday when the bar was full of college kids, but this Friday it was surprisingly slow at the bar. Then again, final summer exams were upon the students at the university. So, Sam cleaned the bunker, did the dishes and some grocery shopping, laundry, archived some stuff, researched, helped some hunter with their own research, took Gohan for a run, played with Gohan, and now was in the music hall.

The music hall had every instrument you could imagine. From the largest tubas to the smallest ocarinas. He learned how to play a few of the ocarinas, one of the violins, the piano, and the guitar. The guitar was his favorite. He picked an aged guitar that has seen better days but still sounds amazing. He loved this guitar and treated it well. He sat down on the piano stool with one leg crossed on the stool while the other was on the floor. He tuned the guitar and started playing.

 _Ooooooh little child, everything's gonna be alright_

 _You're a little lost now_

 _But soon you'll be where you need to be_

 _Moonlight shine upon your path_

 _Let it be your sight in the dark_

 _Ooooh little child_

 _The stars will guide you home_

 _You're a little lost now_

 _But you're on the right track_

 _Ooooh little child_

 _Sweet little child don't you be scared now_

 _Don't you be scared now everything's alright_

 _Let the moonlight light your way_

 _Let the stars guide you home_

 _Oh little child you'll soon be where you need to be_

 _Just let go_

 _Just let it all go_

 _Take a deep breath_

 _Let out a sigh_

 _Close your eyes_

 _Just let go_

 _Sweet little child_

 _Ooooh little child_

 _Sweet little child_

 _Ooooh little child_

 _Welcome home_

Gohan who had been howling along to the song was now howling to represent clapping. His boy was amazing.

Sam laughed and bowed.

"Thank you. Thank you." Sam said.

Sam set the guitar down and turned to the piano. He began to play a haunting tune. At Stanford Jess was in love with Pokemon. She had a purple see-through Gameboy Color and Pokemon Yellow. He got into it a little. Raichu was his favorite Pokemon. He wasn't sure what it was about the creature but he connected to it. Sam for some reason loved Lavender Town. The music especially. He wrote a small lullaby to the song. The lyrics flooding back to him.

 _Sleep my darling_

 _Lay your weary head to rest_

 _Close your eyes_

 _And let yourself drift away_

 _You'll be fine now_

 _The pain has gone away_

 _(Just let go, float away, your pain is gone)_

 _Moonlight shines brightly_

 _Through your window_

 _Let it be your light_

 _Stars will map your way_

 _Just close your eyes a_

 _And drift away_

 _(Pain and sorrow, washed away by tomorrow)_

 _Let yourself go_

 _Give up fighting_

 _Your time has come_

Gohan was always entranced by that one. The haunting but stunning lyrics told a story. A story of you laying there on your deathbed, ready to take your last breath. You are scared and keep fighting when you have nothing left. To face your reaper. That it's okay to let go.

"I suddenly want to play Pokemon now." Sam chuckled to himself.

Gohan barked.

Sam laughed and patted the wolf. He stretched and looked at the time.

"Come on boy. Let's go to the diner and grab some grub. We'll eat at the park tonight." Sam said.

Gohan approved and followed his boy out the door. Sam put on his shoes and decided to walk to the diner in town. It wasn't too far a walk. Ten minutes maybe fifteen max. Gohan followed happily beside his boy, making sure he was alright and nothing was going to hurt him. He waited outside as Sam grabbed them dinner. While he could've turned himself invisible and followed Sam inside, he opted to stay outside. Gohan had sensed and smelled something familiar.

Dean Winchester.

The elder Winchester was in town and Gohan knew Sam wasn't ready to see him quite yet. He would do what he can to keep his boy safe but knew Fate was up to something. What he didn't know. She was up to something though.

Gohan thought back to Sam's song and whined a little.

His little child was a little lost but wasn't ready to go home.

 **Both song lyrics were written by me!**

 **Until Next Time! Can I not be an adult? Just for a bit?**

 **I know I said I would answer reviews in this chapter but it's late and I'm a sleepy pancake. Nighty night y'all!**


	4. LOST: My Motivation

**Hey, my darlings!**

 **I'm so so so sorry about this but it seems I've lost my motivation to finish this story. Ugh. I feel like garbage. Anyway. I will come back and finish this story, promise! I'll be taking my extended hiatus now and I'll see you all in November/December for 12 Days of Sam! If you have any ideas or suggestions for the Holiday fic, please send them in! Even though I'll be on hiatus I'm still open to taking requests and such.**

 **I love you all so so much. I appreciate all the love and support you continue to give me and I hope that when I come, I'll come back strong and deliver the stories you deserve.**

 **Stay sweet, spread love, and do all things with kindness!**

 **Much love and Until Next Time!**

 **Your Wayward Author.**


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